Aug 10 - 19th Sunday in Ordinary Time

First Reading
1 Kings 19:9a,11-13a

Responsorial Psalm
Psalm 85:9-14
 

Second Reading
Romans 9:1-5
 Paul speaks of the blessings that have come to the Israelites.

Gospel Reading
Matthew 14:22-33
 

1st Reading - Our God created the Universe.  Created us.  Created everything.  When I read scripture and He walks with Adam side by side - talking with Him, I feel a little jealous.  Wouldn't it be great to be able to have a "real" conversation with God?  One that you can actually "hear"?  Not just imagine?

In the 1st Reading, God tells Elijah to go outside because the Lord will be walking by.   Where will He be?  In the strong wind?  No!   In the mighty earthquake?  No!  In the fire?  No!  

He was found in the tiny whisper!   How much silence do you have in your life?  I remember my first 5 day silent retreat - I thought I would go crazy!  I had my music to listen to, books to read, I was texting (not talking!) to my family!  I had a hard time sitting still in the silence.  It took me 3 1/2 days to be still and enjoy the silence.  Where are you God?  I don't hear you!    I don't remember hearing anything that whole week.  But I actually began to feel some peace.

The 2nd time I went on the 5 day silent retreat, it was much easier to jump right in.  And now, I find I love the silence.  I turn off the noise in my life.  No music.  No noise at all.  Just silence.  Do I hear God's voice?  Yes!  

It is His presence I feel more clearly.  It is His direction I feel more clearly.  It is His peace I feel.

Be still and Know that I am God.  

In the Psalm today, when I reflected, this verse spoke to me.

Lord, let us see your kindness, and grant us your salvation.
Kindness and truth shall meet;  justice and peace shall kiss.
Truth shall spring out of the earth, and justice shall look down from heaven.

This is what I seek...This is what I pray for!  

The Gospel is one of my favorites -

After having fed the 5000, now the disciples see Jesus walking on water and think they see a GHOST!!!

But Jesus reassures them! “Take courage, it is I; do not be afraid.” 

I love this line!  I repeat it over and over and over and over!  When I am afraid.  Knowing that when I think I am seeing a monster under my bed - in the people who are against me - I know that my Jesus is there with me.   I stick out my had like Peter!  “Lord, if it is you, command me to come to you on the water.” 

Jesus simply says, “Come.”     So, I walk out onto the water.  And just like Peter, I am fine as long as I keep my eyes on Jesus....but the SECOND I look at the Monster, the waves, the problem....I sink into the storm, I begin drowning, I panic, I freak out!   Jesus, Save me!!!!    He holds out His hand and says to me again and again and again “O you of little faith, why did you doubt?”     Then He calms the storm around me.

I try keeping my eyes on Jesus, but the monsters and storms are so big and the world is so distracting.  This is my journey.   Listen to the whisper of God to guide me in this life, "keep your eyes on me!  I know the way, I will be with you always!"